The Ballad of No-Dad

[Sin Studly]

So gather round ye children,
And listen to my epic tale,
A tale of somebodies father,
With winding sheets to unveil,
The tale of a pig who got shot down,
Trying to stop a larceny,
And a punk kid nobody loves,
And a murderer who walked free,

For No-Dad had an emo fit,
And to the board he cried,
Wah, no girls ever like me,
And "OHNOEZ, MY DADDY DIED!"
Twas a pitiful misjudged move,
For not a single person cared,
And everybody laughed at him,
As he sobbed and despaired,

For he was a stupid fucking tard,
Who led a worthless fucking life,
His dad probably drew his gun slow,
To escape his stupid son and wife,
And while I'm not exactly claiming,
It's entirely No-Dads fault,
But maybe if No-Dad wasn't born,
Dead-Dad would have drawn his Colt,

So hark to the tale of No-Dad,
Who gives a bad name to the orphans,
For he is a stupid lying fuck,
Who's an argument for abortions,
But maybe his dad isn't even dead,
Nor burned apon a funeral pyre,
"I'm fourteen, no, wait, seventeen,"
Yes, No-Dad's a worthless liar,

We know he's an attentionwhore,
Who makes up dumb retarded lies,
He probably wanted sympathy,
For the dead dad he fantasised,
And now people keep mocking him,
So he has to stick to his story,
"OhNOEZ omg my Daddy DIED,
Alone, dead, bloody and gory,"

So there'll be no sympathy for No-Dad,
As he bawls at the cemetary,
Until he goes and links us to,
His dead fathers obituary,
For we know it makes the papers,
When somebody shoots a cop,
Even if the only mention is,
"One more closed donut shop,"

So that's the end of No-Dad,
That Punk Kid who is so hated,
Who is now a favourite target,
Of the boys in Pain Incorporated,
And even as this ballad ends,
And not a single soul sheds a tear,
We'll raise a toast to the cop-killer,
And the daddy he made disappear,

So hark to the tale of No-Dad,
Who gives a bad name to the orphans,
For he is a stupid lying fuck,
Who's an argument for abortions,
But maybe his dad isn't even dead,
Nor burned apon a funeral pyre,
"I'm fourteen, no, wait, seventeen,"
Yes, No-Dad's a worthless liar.

[the_GoDdEsS]

Oh noez, I'm so ivil for laughing over this. Muaha. I especially loved the Pain Incorporated reference. *grins*

[clokey43]

Another good ballad. Capturing every detail.

[Izie]

*claps*

I likey :)

[Obie2trice]

Another nice ballad.

[0r4ng3]

This one's still awesome, but not the best one.

[Sin Studly]

I'm never ever going to write a better one than Ashley and Kim. Accept it.

[[Warning] Nimrod In Town]

I'm never ever going to write a better one than Ashley and Kim. Accept it.

No-dad is when you cross Lodat with TPKYL! There's nothing there about me! Write one about me!

[.:SMASH:.]

^i will

*clears throat*
you're gay,
fuck you

im not much of a poet but i like to get my feelings out this way

[[Warning] Nimrod In Town]

Stop posting. Fag.

[.:SMASH:.]

Nimrod In Town']Stop posting. Fag.
hmm that post made an influence on me deciding whether if i should post here or not..

[original_prankster]

'Tis quite awesome, like the last couple you've written.

[Yatesy]

This ballad was awesome, like every other one you've done.

[.:SMASH:.]

This ballad was awesome, like every other one you've done.
theres no point in congragulating him, he doesnt care

[Yatesy]

theres no point in congragulating him, he doesnt care


There's no point of you posting either but you don't hear me complaining.

[.:SMASH:.]

There's no point of you posting either but you don't hear me complaining.
i dont hear you complaining, but i see you complaining

[0r4ng3]

i dont hear you complaining, but i see you complaining
No, you don't see him complaining either, because he's not complaining.

[.:SMASH:.]

No, you don't see him complaining either, because he's not complaining.
yes, he was compalining at me. he said there is no point in me posting here which is true but is considered complaining right?

[0r4ng3]

yes, he was compalining at me. he said there is no point in me posting here which is true but is considered complaining right?
No, he specifically said "but you don't hear me complaining". Surely you understand what he's saying.

[Yatesy]

i dont hear you complaining, but i see you complaining

That's 'cause you can't read.

[.:SMASH:.]

That's 'cause you can't read.
that might be an issue...

[original_prankster]

that might be an issue...
It wouldn't suprise me if you're Sin's next victim. ;)

[.:SMASH:.]

It wouldn't suprise me if you're Sin's next victim. ;)
if you havnt noticed, i dont care how many people are insulting me on this bbs, i just find it ammusing

[Yatesy]

I find it amusing that you're an idiot.

[.:SMASH:.]

I find it amusing that you're an idiot.
i find it ammusing that you are still trying to insult me

[Yatesy]

I'm not insulting you, I'm just stating the obvious. I mean if you didn't care what people thought of you on here, wouldn't you just stop posting?

[coke_a_holic]

It wouldn't suprise me if you're Sin's next victim. ;)
Doubt it, he's completely insignificant.

[.:SMASH:.]

I'm not insulting you, I'm just stating the obvious. I mean if you didn't care what people thought of you on here, wouldn't you just stop posting?
no, this is fun

[0r4ng3]

Doubt it, he's completely insignificant.
That's what I was going to say. We don't know much about Smash. Sin Studly can't write an entire ballad about not being able to read.

[.:SMASH:.]

That's what I was going to say. We don't know much about Smash. Sin Studly can't write an entire ballad about not being able to read.
exactly right. but that sin studly is a creative guy, i reckon he could

[Yatesy]

no, this is fun

Umm how exactly?

[.:SMASH:.]

must i state why?

[Conspiracy of One]

Haha, excellent Justin!

[Yatesy]

must i state why?

Yes, I never ask rhetorical questions.

[.:SMASH:.]

ok fine, it is fun because...no reason, im just different

[original_prankster]

but that sin studly is a creative guy, i reckon he could
What he said.

[SkunkIt]

So....liar.
Have you ever considered being checked for OCD?

[neocon58]

How about all of you stop posting, your turning what was a good thread into a tardfest. Take it to PM.

[TheUnholyNightbringer]

How about all of you stop posting, your turning what was a good thread into a tardfest. Take it to PM.

What he said. Brainless fucktards.

[.:SMASH:.]

What he said. Brainless fucktards.
this thread is boring now

[Linda]

Now???????

[0r4ng3]

Really? Even better than this?
Hitler killed six million,
And you can't even kill yourselves.

[0r4ng3]

I get what you mean. Personally, I preferred:
They came to an internet forum,
To annoy us with their shit,
With intelligence and literacy,
Like that of the average brit.

[Offspring7]

Out of all of them, I'm with TTIG; the "this means he speaks latin" was the funniest line. it actually made me LOL.

[JoY]

And while I'm not exactly claiming,
It's entirely No-Dads fault,
But maybe if No-Dad wasn't born,
Dead-Dad would have drawn his Colt,



For we know it makes the papers,
When somebody shoots a cop,
Even if the only mention is,
"One more closed donut shop,"


So that's the end of No-Dad,
That Punk Kid who is so hated,
Who is now a favourite target,
Of the boys in Pain Incorporated,
And even as this ballad ends,
And not a single soul sheds a tear,
We'll raise a toast to the cop-killer,
And the daddy he made disappear,

parts that cracked me up GOOD. fucking love it.